


Starting Over

by Shimmera



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate 3x07 ending, F/F, Fix-It
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-31
Updated: 2016-05-20
Packaged: 2018-05-30 08:59:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6417274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shimmera/pseuds/Shimmera
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alternate 3x07 in which Clarke is shot, but Titus can't operate a gun so no one dies. As Clarke recovers something happens in Arkadia that changes everything.  What happened, and who, if anyone survived?</p><p>And I shall add since I'm still way raw from 3x07, no dead lesbians. And I'm reworking the A.I storyline/ the Nightbloods cause its full of plotholes.  </p><p>Title is a temporary one at the moment.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Clarke scrambled to dodge the first bullet, belatedly realizing she was moving away from the door, away from an escape. She ducked behind a dresser as Titus let off another shot. Maybe she could reason with him.

“Titus if you do this, it will destroy Lexa. After Costia-“

“You think too highly of your worth, Wanheda.” Titus raised the gun and fired two more shots, one went somewhere towards the balcony, the other ripped through the dresser and firey pain erupted in her arm causing her to let out a painful cry. Titus snarled in triumph. He raised the gun and tried his best to aim before pulling the trigger.

Click.

Hearing Titus pull the trigger repeatedly, likely not understanding that it was out of ammo, Clarke took that moment to charge. Honestly how combat efficient could a bald man in a robe really be? Clarke lunged at him, intending to tackle the man to the floor, but stumbled and nearly fell when she met thin air. She turned to hopefully still get the upper hand but instead, felt an explosion of pain in her head as Titus used the butt of the and slammed it into the back of her head. Her vision blurred then everything went black.

CLCLCLCL

Lexa heard the gunshot and ran, knowing only one place such a weapon could be firing from. Clarke. Fear gripped Lexa, but she had the sense to call for her guard as she ran, pausing before opening the door to Clarke’s room, it wasn’t smart to rush into an enclosed space when Skaikru weapons were involved. She only waited a moment however, not hearing any more gunshots she charged into the room, a dagger she always kept strapped to her waist drawn. The sight before her nearly broke her already thin control over her emotions.

Titus, her trusted mentor was straddling Clarke, a knife raise in the air, seconds from landing a killing blow. The commander did not hesitate, with nearly inhuman speed her dagger flew from her hand and impaled itself Titus’ forearm, he dropped his own dagger with an anguished cry of pain. 

“Arrest him, send for my fisa, now!” She swept across the room to kneel at Clarke’s side as her warriors obeyed. Her eyes flicked to the Skaikru boy tied up and she absently ordered that he be taken to a guest room, his wounds cared for and that he not be allowed to leave those rooms until she indicated otherwise. She vaguely heard Titus throw out some sort of plea for forgiveness but she ignored it. Her focus was on Clarke. She took in the bullet wound in the girl’s shoulder and her bloodied and bruised face. Blood pooled from a wound on the back of Clarke’s head as well.

Alarmed by the amount of blood Lexa ripped the sleeve of her shirt off, and carefully lifted Clarke’s head to staunch the blood flow. Her heart clenched painfully as unfamiliar panic began to take root inside her. Her eyes moving rapidly from one wound to the other, completely overwhelmed with the feelings coursing through her veins. 

“Heda?” Lexa’s head snapped up and around as her personal healer, Drakon, and one of his assistant healers, entered the room. Drakon, a man of medium build and height with shaggy, ear length brown hair, moved with the speed and skill of a warrior that he most certainly was not. 

“yu souda fis em op”. She intended it to come out as an order but her voice cracked and it sounded more like a desperate plea to her ears. Lexa did not care how weak she sounded in that moment in that moment. All that mattered was Clarke. 

“Sha, Heda,” Drakon answered, briefly meeting his Heda’s eyes before returning to examining Clarke. They moved Clarke to the bed, and then there was little else Lexa could do while Drakon worked. Lexa closed her eyes briefly willing the spirit of the commanders to bring her the calm she needed in order to not break down in front of one of her subjects. She tried to distract herself with matters of state she’d need to address soon, and now the added problem of what to do with Titus. But with here twitch and cry that escaped unbidden from Clarke’s lips as Drakon and his assistant labored over her wounds. One having to hold Clarke down as they removed the bullet from her shoulder. 

Lexa could only watch for so long before she moved to a spot by the bed that was out of the way as Drakon, still labored diligently on saving Clarke. “How is she?” she questioned quietly, not wanting to startle the man into accidently injuring Clarke further.

“She has lost much blood, heda,” Drakon informed her with a sigh. “But her pulse is strong. I removed the skaikru projectile from her arm, and it will be fine, provided infection does not set in the wound. Her head wound is the most troublesome, I have done what I can for it. The rest is up to Wanheda. If she wakens in the next few days, I believe she will recover, but if not…” he shook his head and Lexa felt icy fear nearly break her commander’s mask at the mere thought of what he did not say. “By your leave, I will return in the morning to change her bandages and reapply a salve to her wounds.”

Lexa nodded. “Mochof Drakon.”

Drakon nodded and left silently. Lexa let out a shuddering breath when the door closed behind him. Carefully she maneuvered herself on the opposite side of Clarke and drew near as she dared to the girl, brushing her fingers gently along Clarke’s forearm, comforted by the warmth of her skin. 

“Reshop ain hodnes.” she whispered, watching Clarke’s every breath until the glow of the setting sun had long left. It was only then, in the cover of night, that she let her tears fall.

CLCLCLCLCLCL

Clarke opened her eyes to morning sunlight and she winced, quickly shutting them again. She then became aware of throbbing pain…everywhere. She wished she could go back to sleep.

“Clarke?” A soft familiar voice beckoned her from blissful oblivion. Clarke opened her eyes more carefully this time, blinking as she adjusted to the light, and was rewarded by a beautiful and all too rarely smiling Lexa looking down at her from the opposite side of the bed. 

“Lex-“ Clarke winced and licked her lips. Lexa hastily reached for a pitcher and cup on the bedside table and helped Clarke take in a few much needed mouthfuls of water. “Thank you,” she said as Lexa say the cup aside. Lexa then gently palmed Clarke’s cheek with one hand and with the other brushed away a few stray hairs from Clarke’s face.

“It is good to see you awake,” Lexa said with a mixture of fatigue and relief. Clarke could see by the red of Lexa’s eyes that her…girlfriend? had been not been sleeping much if at all while she had been out.

“How long was I out?” 

Lexa grimaced, her smile replaced with a strange mixture of her stoic commander façade and worry. “Three days,” her careful tone worried Clarke.

“What’s happened? Is it Titus?” Clarke said as she tried to sit up but realized too late that was not a good idea. Pain and dizziness erupted in her skull and Lexa scrambled to lay her back, gently as possible.

“You mustn’t move. You’ll aggravate your wounds.” Lexa’s eyes were wide and alert scanning Clarke for any signs of damage. It almost made Clarke smile but she would not be distracted.

“What’s wrong?” she tried again, once her pain had subsided enough. 

“You should rest more,” Lexa evaded. 

“Lexa. Tell me. If it’s Titus I can-“

“Titus was taken care of,” Lexa said with a sigh. Probably realizing that Clarke would not let this go. The commander’s shoulders drooped tiredly or perhaps in defeat.

“Then what is it?”

“It’s…it’s hard for me to describe…it was like nothing any have seen before, it must have been some strange Skaikru weapon I’ve not heard of…” Lexa’s eyes were focused on everything but Clarke’s increasingly alarmed gaze.

“Lexa, you’re scaring me, just say it.” Clarke had never seen Lexa so nervous, what could it possibly be? “Has something happened in Arkadia?”

Lexa swallowed hard finally looking up and answering Clarke with a pained reluctance.

“The armies were gathered for two days, waiting for a sign from Arkadia as I instructed but then…” Lexa shook her head. “It dropped from the sky and there was an explosion unlike any ever seen and then it was just gone.”

Clarke took one horrified breath. “What was Lexa?” Knowing the answer even as she asked it.

“I am sorry Clarke, Arkadia is gone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any typos I am my own beta at the moment, but I'll try to correct any glaring errors as I go along.
> 
> I'm still kinda learning trigedasleng so hopefully I've not messed up any translations.
> 
>  
> 
> Please comment and let me know what you all think or if I should continue with this!  
> trigedasleng translations:
> 
> fisa= Healer  
> heda=Commander  
> yu souda fis em op= You need to heal her.  
> sha heda= yes, commander  
> mochof= thank you  
> Reshop ain hodnes= goodnight, my love  
> Skaikru= Sky people


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raven learns some disturbing information and planning ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for all the comments and reviews. They spur my writing on! I apologize for no Lexa or Clarke this chapter but I thought perhaps it might be interesting to know what went down in Arkadia. Hopefully it's more entertaining than the Arkadia bits on the actual show. More Clarke and Lexa to come!
> 
>  
> 
> Please review and enjoy!

**Arkadia-two days prior**

 

Raven Reyes knew something was off. But yet, at the same time, she hadn’t felt this…free since before she’d landed on Earth. At least she thought so. So many of her memories just were not there anymore. And this Allie woman, what was she doing on the Ark mainframe? Why had Raven been so stupid as to hook the bitch up the AI equivalent of an all you can eat buffet?

Raven shook her head. Even with her pain sensors or whatever blocked by the chip, her neck ached from a day spent over a monitor, trying to narrow down whatever it was Allie was looking for. She was just about to shut down her work when her eyes caught something on the screen.  
Launch codes? What the hell? Raven clicked a few more keys and with every passing second she she felt the blood drain from her face. She felt the pull of the chip inside her. It was telling her that this wasn’t something to concern herself with, no big deal. The City of Light would make everything better. 

Raven bowed her head and closed her eyes, scrunching them tight. She shook her head violently, shaking the comforting, tempting thoughts away. She was a fighter. She would not sit back and ignore this. I need to warn Abby and Kane. Now! The mechanic turned computer hacker looked around the empty room nervously, suddenly afraid. Seeing no one, she hastily shut down all evidence of her meddling and turned to leave. As she reached the door she nearly collided with someone else who was entering at the same time.

“Raven, just the girl I was looking for,” Jaha said with a smile.

“Probably not in the run you down in the doorway sense huh,” Raven laughed nervously, wincing at her own lame joke. Jaha merely smiled in that cold, empty way he had been doing ever since he had returned to Arkadia. Why had Raven never noticed that before? It was sickening, but there was a part of her that wanted, needed to feel soothed by him. Stupid fucking chip. She mentally gritted her teeth. She wasn’t sure how long she could resist it, but she only needed to for just a bit longer…

“No, exactly, no. Though I wonder where are you off to in such a hurry as to not have seen me?”

“Oh, you know…I just um…kinda need to pee. Yeah that’s it. Silly me, ignoring nature’s call to tinker with…things, you know? I can’t resist tinkering.” Shit that was lame Reyes. Did the chip sap you of your brains too?

Surprisingly though, it seemed to work. Jaha coughed uncomfortably. “Well I was just coming to tell you that we are all leaving tonight. So you need to gather your things and meet us at the gate.”

Raven blinked, feigning surprise. Internally she was screaming. This was the confirmation of what she had found in the computer. No… “Everyone? Surely Pike wouldn’t want us to leave with the blockade?”

“No, only the followers of the light. The rest are lost to the darkness I’m afraid, we could only save so many it seems. We have discovered everything we could here and must move on.”

“And you think we can just waltz pass the blood thirsty grounders out there? No offence, but I’m not quite ready to enter the city of the light just yet.”

Jaha frowned. “You should always be willing and happy at the chance to enter the city of the light. There is no pain there,” Jaha closed his eyes and shook his head before opening them and meeting Raven’s once more. “But no, the grounders will not be a problem, at least to the west, there will be a break among the…desert clan, I believe they are called.” 

“How’d you convince them of that?” 

Jaha put both palms to Raven’s cheeks, bent forward, and kissed her head. She fought not to shrug him off. “Your questions will be answered in  
time. For now you need only worry about your…pressing issue, and meet us at the gate. We leave soon.”

“Right…right of course,” Raven swallowed, her panic threatening to overcome her charade as a happy crazytown believer. “I’ll hurry and meet you all there.”

“Good, go now then.” He stood aside and Raven did not hesitate to hurry passed him. Her mind already turning to finding Abby and getting everyone she could the hell out of Arkadia as quickly as possible.

In her haste to leave, Raven missed entirely as Allie appeared from the shadows of the room, moving next to Jaha as they watched Raven run down the hall.

“Do you believe she discovered our plan?” she asked.

“I’ve not doubt,” Jaha answered.

“Good,” Allie nodded her head. “We need only follow her then.”

 

CLCLCLCL

“Raven are you sure about this?” Kane asked. They were standing in his personal quarters. Abby, Octavia and a downcast Bellamy Blake were crowded around her. Jasper sat on Kane’s cot back in the corner of the room, his eyes unfocused. 

“I am. Jaha warned me himself, we have to get as many out of here as we can.”

“This is ridiculous,” Abby scoffed. “I admit Jaha has gone off the deep end, but you’re suggesting he is going to allow this Allie to nuke Arkadia? That’s just as absurd as you all seeing a imaginary woman walking around.”

“Jaha isn’t Jaha anymore Abby,” Octavia spoke up. “I say we need to stop standing around and gather who we can and get out.”

“Shouldn’t we try to stop them?” Bellamy asked, finally looking up. “If we told Pike-“

“No!” Everyone shot Bellamy down in the same instant.

“If we told Pike, he’d probably just shoot half Arkadia in their sleep,” Octavia snorted glaring at her brother.

“Look I don’t agree with what he did, alright? That’s why I’m here now, but he’s in charge and if Jaha is planning something he has the resources to end it,” Bellamy did not back down.

Octavia scoffed. “You’re only here because I am. For all we know you’re just spying for Pike, trying to find a way to knock me out and “save” me from myself.” Octavia snarled, walking right up into Bellamy’s personal space and glaring into his now more defeated gaze.

“Look, we don’t have time for world war Blake right now,” Raven broke in. “Allie is connected to the Ark alright? There’s nothing Pike can shoot at to fix this. We need to get the hell out now, preferably without Jaha and the zombies knowing about it.”

“You’re one of those zombies too you know. Or is everyone conveniently forgetting that?” Jasper spoke up for the first time. 

“Look I’m resisting the damn thing alright? You’re going to have to trust me. Hell you’re trusting him.” She pointed at Bellamy. 

“Alright enough,” Kane’s usual even temper had snapped. “Not having enough trust is what got us here in the first place.” He was looking at Bellamy. Bellamy huffed and looked down again, hating that Kane was right. If had just listened and trusted Kane, Octavia or…Clarke when they had warned him…Pike might not have found the support he now had. “According to Raven we haven’t much time so let’s focus on what we can get done.”

“I can radio Indra,” Octavia spoke up. “She might be able to get us some grounder clothes or something, that would at least help us a little bit if we run into any grounders.”

Kane nodded. “Do it.” Octavia turned and walked to the corner of the room pulling out a walkie as she did so. “Once she’s finished, we need to round up everyone we can trust and make it to the secret passage out. Bellamy you stay with me.” 

“Marcus, we can’t just leave people here to die-“whatever Abby was going to say died on her lips when a deafening boom shook the room and everyone lost the balance. The lights flickered off for several moments before returning. “What the hell was that?”

“Let’s find out,” Raven said, exchanging worried glances with everyone. They all raced outside and saw they were not the only Arkers scrambling to see what happened. They were all looking the wrong way though, Raven noted. “This way, to the west” she told her companions as she moved to a ladder that would take them to the top of the gate. They all climbed up and what they saw nearly drove each of them to their knees and disbelief. In the distance, where once there were thousands of grounders blockading Arkadia from the west, was a gaping hole. 

They all looked to one another. No longer able to deny what Raven had been telling them. 

“Let’s move,” Kane said. They all scrambled to do as he said. To save what few they could.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry all for how long it took me to get this chapter out. I admit I'm kind of struggling to want to continue this as I'm for one pretty sick of the Allie story line. I was going to let the rest of the season play out and see if any of it inspired me, but it kind of made it worse haha. However, I do have an outline of how I want this story to go and hopefully if you all are still interested in seeing how it ends I will find my muse again. :)
> 
> I hope you all like this chapter!

Lexa sat back in her throne and groaned as the last of her ambassadors left the throne room. She rubbed her temples in futile hope of relief from the headache she felt would never cease the way things were going.

Once more everyone wanted Lexa to slay the mighty Wanheda, but the reasoning this time would take more than convincing Clarke to kneel before her and swearing fealty to put an end to it. Three devastating explosions had occurred, two on the day Arkadia fell, and one more days later. The third had destroyed nothing more than the wildlife, but it had not been far from Polis. 

Clarke, in a brief moment when she wasn’t catatonic and grieving for the loss of her people, had told her the blasts had been ‘bombs’. Like the ones that had destroyed the old world before the first commander came. Fleim skaifaya was what the people had dubbed it. Arkadia did not have access to such weapons and certainly not Clarke who had been unconscious during the first two bombs. Nor would she ever destroy her own people. She had told the ambassadors as such minutes before, as they gathered to pointlessly discuss what they could do to assure the people they were safe.

“It does not matter if Wanheda commands the fleim skaifaya or not,” one of her oldest ambassadors from the desert clan, the clan most effected by the attacks save perhaps Skaikru, said. “the people believe she does and if we killed her now, the people would feel safe again.”

“Until the next fleim skaifaya fall,” Lexa reminded in a bored tone. “Killing Wanheda accomplishes nothing. With Skaikru destroyed she is the one needed to combat whomever possess the power of fleim skaifaya. Killing her would lead only to more losses of our people.”

“But if you took the power of Wanheda-“ the gray haired many started.

“Em pleni!” Lexa had lost her patience. “I will not discuss this yet again. If this is all you have ti say then we are done.”

“But Heda-“ another ambassador tried to pitch in.

“This meeting is adjourned.” Lexa bared her teeth, squashing any further protests from her ambassadors’ minds. They still feared her power, but she knew their questioning her decisions now would soon lead to another challenge. But that was not something that she could help at the moment. As her disgruntled ambassadors filed out of her throne room she turned her mind to a problem she hoped she could fix. Clarke.

As the commander, Lexa needed Clarke now, more than ever. She needed answers and, yes, Lexa admitted to herself, guidance on what to do. How she could save what remained of her people from this new threat. 

As simply Lexa, the woman, she needed Clarke. She had been terrified walking into that room and seeing the woman she loved covered in blood and about to be murdered by one of the few people left in Lexa’s life that she trusted. Clarke had almost died then, and if Clarke did not find it within herself to overcome her grief, Lexa would lose her just the same. The thought of that was nearly crippling, and there was only so much she could do to help Clarke this time. She could save Clarke from physical threats time and time again, but this one, this was a battle only Clarke could fight.

Lexa rested her head in her hands, leaning forward in her throne, allowing for a brief moment for the fear of losing everything she held dear to fall apart. Only for a moment. Lexa took several, deep breaths before she stood and strode from the room, her red sash billowing behind her. Clarke had stood by and supported Lexa when she fought for her life against Roan. Now Lexa would stand by and support Clarke while she fought her own battle.

CLCLCLCLCLCLCL

“Clarke, Heda wishes for you to eat,” Aden sighed as his plea was met again with silence. Aden had some hope that Clarke may have been better that day. He had somehow convinced Clarke to let the boy lead her out onto the balcony of her room, where she now sat in a small worn crimson chaise that overlooked the vast green woods that surrounded Polis. Clarke had breathed in the morning air deeply and Aden felt hope rise in his chest at the sight. Heda would be so pleased when she came back from the council meeting and Wanheda had returned to them. But Clarke’s eyes locked on to a large barren spot barely seen in the distance. Smoke still rose from charred remains of what was once lush forest. Clarke’s eyes had dulled and she was gone again. Lost in her own mind. Aden had sunk down beside Clarke, defeated.

Hours later, food had been brought up for them both and though he knew it was futile he tried to get the former Skaikru leader to eat. Aden felt as if he had failed his Heda for the first time in his life. He had been tasked with watching over Clarke when Lexa could not. To protect her from any that would harm her. Of that he had yet to fail. But Heda had also hoped that Aden might bring Clarke’s spirit back to the earth as Heda had yet to succeed herself at the endeavor.  
“Please Wanheda,” he tried again. He nearly jumped from his chair when Clarke’s head snapped quickly so that her eyes met his. They were no longer dull and lifeless but full of hate and tears.  
“People die when I lead them,” she said angrily. It was several moments of tense silence, Clarke’s pain filled eyes boring into his own. “I really am the commander of death,” her voice became a tortured whisper. Aden’s eyes widened in panic. He may be Heda’s most promising nightblood, but he did not possess the wisdom of the spirit of the commanders. Not enough to deal with this. But perhaps the commander’s training could bring some comfort to Clarke as it always had Aden.  
“Heda says that as a leader it is impossible to save everyone.”

“And if you save no one? What kind of leader does that make me?”

“You did not send the fleim skaifaya Wan-Clarke.”

“No.” she said quietly the anger leaving her eyes as quickly as it had appeared. Her gaze turned back to the smoke in the distance. “But I should have been there to die with them,” she said.

“Skrish!” Aden burst out, his patience leaving him. He was not Heda after all, only a boy. The harshness to his voice must have startled Clarke, as she turned back to him, surprised. “You claim that your Skaikru are the same as us. That we are all of one people, yet you would rather join the dead than help Heda save thousands more. I may be a goufa yet, but it is you that are behaving like one.”

“Did Lexa tell you to say that?” Clarke’s voice was angry once more. Good, Aden thought. Anger is better than nothing at all.

“Heda has only told me to watch over you while she tries to save us all. You sit here and mourn the dead while she carries the weight of the living and her worry for you on her shoulders. She needs you.”

“No one needs me Aden. I’m the commander of death.” 

“You mean it as an insult, Clarke, but it is not. Wanheda is a title. A word. It means what you want it to mean, what power you give it. You want to command death to save others, then do so. Do not let the power of Wanheda to overcome Clarke of the Sky. Use it to help Heda save our people.” A long silence enveloped them. 

“I have no people,” Clarke said, her voice raw and cracking. Aden shook his head.

“We are your people now Clarke,” He swallowed nervously, briefly wondered if the commanders’ spirits were guiding his words, for he could not otherwise fathom where they were coming from. “we must look after each other now.” The boy saw a single tear, then another and another, fall from Clarke’s eyes and relief coursed over him. This is the most emotion anyone had seen from Clarke in days. Aden hesitated only for a moment before allowing his instinct to drive him. He placed a hand on Clarke’s shoulder and that’s when the dam broke. Clarke reached for the startled boy and she flung her arms around him, burying her face in his shoulder as she wept. He wrapped his smaller arms around her and hoped it helped.

It was not long after that Heda returned, finding them both in the same position out on the balcony. Aden turned his head at the sound of someone entering Clarke’s chambers and saw only a moment’s shock on Heda’s face before she had quickly masked it. Clarke, startled by the sudden movement of the boy, looked up and for the first time in days, her alert eyes met the concerned pools of green. 

Aden rose from his seat to stand at attention before the commander. “Heda I-“

“Thank you Aden, you have done well,” Aden nodded and left, taking the praise and dismissal for what they were and he left the chambers without a word. Inwardly, he prayed with all that was in him that the Wanheda he had grown to know the last few weeks had finally returned to them.

“Clarke?” Lexa’s voice clicked on the “k” in the way that had always brought warmth to Clarke. Even in her darkest moments of grief she had felt it. 

“I’m here,” Clarke replied reaching out a shaking hand. Lexa needed no further prompting and she quickly replaced Aden’s vacated seat and scooped Clarke into her arms. Clarke clung to Lexa desperately, as if they had been apart for days. And, Clarke reflected, in a way they had been. Lexa maneuvered them so that she was laying back against the chaise and Clarke rested against her chest, their legs entwining automatically. Lexa nuzzled into Clarke’s hair, inhaling deeply, careful of the stiches from Clarke’s still healing head wound.

“I have missed you, Clarke.” She whispered quietly. “It pained me to see you hurt and I could not help.” The raw vulnerability in her voice tore at Clarke’s heart.

“I didn’t mean to worry you,” Clarke apologized. Then Clarke felt Lexa smile against the top of her head before replacing it with a gentle kiss.

“You are not to blame, Clarke. I cannot fathom what you are feeling right now,” she paused giving the top of Clarke’s head another kiss, Clarke returned it with a kiss to Lexa’s jaw before she returned to tucking her head under Lexa’s chin. “I am only glad you are with me now.”

“I feel so lost,” Clarke whispered. “My people are gone.”

“We are your people Clarke,” she disagreed. “You are not alone.”

“I know,” she nodded slightly. “Your mini me told me just the same.” Lexa smiled, thrilled Clarke had attempted a joke.

“I will remember to thank Aden,” she promised. Clarke nodded again.

“He’s pretty smart for a kid,” she agreed.

“He has minded my teachings well,” Lexa said with unmasked pride.

“Will you tell me what I’ve missed while in my self-imposed exile?” Clarke asked. Lexa frowned at the question.

“You do not need to burden yourself further right now Clarke, you should take the time to grieve.”

Clarke sat up slightly so she could meet Lexa’s eyes. “I think if I do that I’ll drive myself crazy. I need something to focus on. Aden said you might need my help, so please let me help.”

Lexa shook her head. “Not yet, you are still recovering from your injuries and-“

“What happened to Titus? Can you tell me that at least?” Clarke changed tactics.

Lexa groaned and bowed her head. With a sigh she looked up and her eyes told Clarke that she’d given up trying to argue. “Titus is in the dungeon. His fate has yet to be decided.”

Clarke looked surprised but not upset at the news. “Don’t kill him.”

“He tried to kill you Clarke, and was with intent to force my hand into a war. Same as Gustus.”

“Blood must not have blood.” Clarke reminded.

“He tried to kill you Clarke.” 

“Then banish him,” Clarke said. “He attacked me to put an end to blood must not have blood. If you put him to death, he wins.”

“That is why he is still in the dungeon Clarke,” Lexa said with a small smile. Clarke looked confused.

“If you don’t intend to kill him, why are you arguing with me?”

Lexa raised a hand and gently traced the confused furrow on Clarke’s brow with reverence. “Perhaps because I have not seen you this…alive in so long, I have even missed arguing.” The furrow disappeared and Clarke smiled. Taking Lexa’s hand in her own she brought it down to her lips and gave it a gentle kiss.

“I’m sorry I worried you.”

“Don’t be,” Lexa replied softly. “Since falling from the sky you have lost far more than any should. You deserve the time to grieve.” 

“I don’t think there is much time for that in this world,” Clarke said, her voice still regretful. She looked down, her hand having entwined itself with Lexa’s she began ideally caressing the back of Lexa’s hand with her thumb.

“Perhaps not much, but I had hoped to give you what time I could.” She bent her head forward to their foreheads’ touched. They both smiled, and for a moment, simply basked in the feeling of being together.

Clarke sighed after a moment, but did not move. “A wise person once told me…the dead are gone the living are hungry.” Lexa let out a surprised laugh.

“You are stubborn ai niron.” 

“I have a sneaking suspicion that’s one of the things you like about me,” Clarke said, her face turned in an almost smile. Lexa gave another laugh before, without warning, she reached for Clarke and the world whirled for a moment until she found herself held, held gently in the arms of a now standing Lexa. Clarke wrapped her arm around Lexa’s neck without comment. 

“I will tell you all of what has happened if you agree to eat while we do.” Her voice was teasing, but her eyes were clearly pleading. Clarke nodded finding it one of the easiest compromises Lexa had ever proposed to her. Just before she answered her stomach let out a grumble that clearly stated its preference to both of them.

“Deal,” she agreed with a gentle laugh. Lexa smiled one of her rare full smiles that lit her entire face. Despite the situation, she was clearly happy that Clarke was finally making an effort once more. Lexa moved them both back into Clarke’s chambers to the small dining area where they would discuss much. Despite their smiles and gentle banter, Clarke’s heart was still heavy with her grief. But she would no longer let it consume her. 

CLCLCLCLCLCLCL

Outrage broke in the throne room as the ambassadors entered to take their seats. “What is she doing here?” one said.  
Clarke sat in what had been designated her chair weeks before, fully intent on attending this meeting, despite Lexa’s insistence that she still take time to mourn. There would be time for that when they were certain Polis would not be the next target of their mystery bomber. 

“As ambassador of the 13th clan, Clarke has every right to attend this meeting.”

“The 13th clan is no more!” the same man said, the ambassador from the desert clan again. 

“Skaikru lives in those that survived, in Clarke Kom Skaikru. She is also the only one left with the knowledge we need to find and defeat this unseen foe. This meeting is for the purposes of gathering the findings of each clan about these attacks in order to do this. Now report.” Lexa’s voice was iron and though clearly there was still an air of disapproval in the room in regards to Clarke’s presence, the matter was dropped. 

“Yes, Heda,” the desert clan ambassador ground out between clenched teeth. “The desert clan has little to report as no further fleim skaifaya attacks-“  
The doors to the throne room burst open and all heads turned startled at the interruption. In strode a hurried and incredibly haggard looking Indra, her skin and clothes still covered in dirt and blood, likely having not stopped upon reaching Polis to clean herself up.

“Heda, I bring urgent news for you and Clarke Kom Skaikru.” Indra’s voice was tired but strong.

“Clear the room, now.” Lexa commanded and surprisingly the ambassadors complied with minimal protest. Once they had left Lexa rose to great Indra, grasping her forearm in a warrior’s clasp. “I am glad to see you have survived.”

“Thank you Heda,” Indra said, her eyes moving from Lexa’s to Clarke who still sat in her chair. “I am not the only to survive Arkadia.”

“What?” Clarke rushed from her spot to Lexa’s side, her gaze boring into Indra’s. “Who? My mother? Kane? Raven?” Lexa moved a hand to the small of Clarke’s back both in comfort and indicate she should let Indra speak.

“Your friends and mother all live.” Indra nodded to Clarke. Clarke let out a soft gasp of shock. Despite what was likely about to become yet another complication, Lexa allowed herself a smile for what this news would mean to Clarke. Her face returned to her commander’s mask as Indra continued. “The one called Raven learned of the first of the…bombs before they happened and Kane gathered and organized as many as he could to follow him out of Arkadia before it was no more. I met up with them and lead them to several of our underground emergency shelters. They wait there now while I volunteered to come to Polis on their behalf to request they be allowed to take sanctuary within our walls.”

“How many are left,” Lexa questioned.

“One hundred and forty remain of Skaikru, all loyal to Kane and to the coalition.”

“They can’t all come here,” Clarke said, surprising both Lexa and Indra. Lexa paused reflectively for a few moments. Indra looked incredulous. 

“Do you no longer care for your people Clarke Kom Skaikru? They are but children without their guns and machinery.”

“Yes,” Clarke reasoned, “but if I am being blamed for the bombs as the only survivor and it comes to light that some survived Arkadia, we’ll be back to square one with everyone wanting us dead. We need to figure out who is responsible for the bombs and put an end to it before we deal with the survivors.” 

Lexa remained stoic and poised but inwardly she was beaming with pride at Clarke’s wise words, not to mention the pang of sympathy that once more, Clarke could not be reunited with her loved ones. “I will send a number of gonas that can be trusted with supplies to help the Skaikru remain where they are for now. However, I believe it is important that Raven Kom Skaikru be brought here as she seems to have more information that we need.” Lexa looked to Clarke to gage her approval of her plan. Clarke merely nodded.

“I could manage to bring another if you wish, your mother perhaps?” Indra offered. Clarke inhaled a pained breath, tempted by the offer, but she shook her head. “No, my Mom will need to be there to help everyone survive while we deal with this. Unless Raven thinks someone else would be needed for us to figure this out, don’t risk bringing another.”

Lexa nodded. “It will take a short while to organize the supplies, please Indra, take the time to rest before you travel once more.” 

“Thank you Heda,” Indra nodded respectfully before taking her leave to do just that.

Clarke turned to Lexa once the doors had closed and they were alone. “They’re alive,” she said before she found herself enfolded in Lexa’s arms. Tears of shock and relief that she had been holding back erupting. 

“They’re alive,” Lexa replied softly into Clarke’s ear, happy that for the moment, they could take time to celebrate such wondrous news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fleim skaifaya -star flame or flaming star


End file.
